Men’s Ministry — Family Ministry

There are many fine and noble men’s ministries yet very few really address the heart of the matter. We tend to cater to men through physiological or psychological avenues where we attempt to address the ills of society by fixing the environment we sprang from. We try to cuddle men. We try to coax men to do the right thing. We may try to shame men into repentance. All around us families are being torn part, quite literally from limb to limb simply because our men are not really men at all and the family lies fully exposed to the enemy.  I respectfully submit that where the man leads, or fails to lead, so goes the family. In America, families are loosing the fight for the hearts, minds and souls of our young. The heart of the matter is not a physical or mental problem. It is in fact a heart problem.

Jeremiah 17:9-10 The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked:who can know it? I the Lord search the heart, I try the reins, even to give every man according to his ways, and according to the fruit of his doings.

The core thing that is needed is that men would turn back to God, turn to Jesus and repent of their wicked ways. We men need a wake up call to shake us from our lethargic and mundane existences. We need to be forcibly shaken and stirred to seek the truth or we will lie in our own waste and our own blood and simply languish and expire.  The enemy of our soul has most of us right where he wants us. If there was ever a time when men needed to drop all the facades and every pretense and earnestly seek the face of God – it is now!

1 Corinthians 11: 3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

As men, we are the head of our family. Our head is Jesus Himself, whose head is God Almighty. If the family is falling apart or being torn apart, it is our responsibility to stand in the gap, pray and apply the ointment that will heal our families. We are appointed and anointed for this. The forces that we face are fearsome and vicious beyond anything we can face alone. We must have God on our side. He must be our covering if we are going to prevail. We are accountable to Jesus. He is the author and the finisher of our faith. If we align ourselves with God, following His precepts and His ordinances we can’t fail for He will hold us up and He will carry us through.

If we have been wounded, we must find healing for ourselves before we can heal our families. We can begin to pull the pieces into proper perspective and ask, then rely on Jesus to help us, but we need to seek healing for our souls and spirits so we can stand against those that oppose us. So many men today are walking wounded, even defeated lives when they could stop and receive healing from the Lord. Then, they can in turn offer and provide the healing their families need. When I minister in jails or prisons, it is amazing how many men have been deeply hurt or abandoned by their own fathers. These wounds tend to be self-perpetuating and run in family lines. Many are fathers who have done the exact same thing to their children that their own fathers did to them. Jesus is the only answer to this and He will give us a new heart; a heart of flesh rather than of stone:

Ezekiel 36:26-27 A new heart also will I give you, and a new spirit will I put within you: and I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you an heart of flesh. And I will put my spirit within you, and cause you to walk in my statutes, and ye shall keep my judgments, and do them. 

Families need strong, loving and caring men at the helm. Men are called to be the head of the family. The man must take the lead in serving God or serving mammon. The man must take the lead and stand against evil – in all it’s wiles. The man must take the lead and be loving and compassionate towards all those he is accountable for.  The man must take the lead and forgive all those who have wounded him – for his own healing. The man must decide and commit to be honest, to have integrity and to be holy. When men lead, the family will follow. We can take our families back from the world, back from the enemy and back from certain destruction. When we see a young man floundering, we can reach out and mentor and teach, and love them into the kingdom. Draw a line in the sand, and declare “I will go no further from God. I will turn and repent and seek God!”

I often think of men as soldiers or warriors. If you are a Christian, then you are in a battle for righteousness sake whether you acknowledge it or not. I served in the armed forces for a dozen years and I know the cadre. There are some who are wholly committed and there are some who are riding on the coattails of their brothers. There are some you want to stand with you, and some you want to stand in front of you. We are not all equal and we are not all good at everything. But, we are all good at something. That’s why armies are created so we can exploit the strengths of the many. This is also true of the Lord’s army and there is a unique position for each one of us there.

As men, we need to gather as a group of like-minded men who have committed ourselves to purity, to holiness and integrity. If you don’t have that, seek it! Look in your churchs mens ministry, or a para-christian organization like the Full Gospel Business Men’s Fellowship or some other Godly avenue. There is strength in coming together as men seeking God, seeking to become all He intends us to become. We hold one another accountable and we sharpen our resolve together. This is not a fraternity, not the lodge or the elks and any other such secular gathering. I attend a weekly prayer meeting of the Full Gospel Business Men’s Fellowship International that rejuvenates and invigorates my spirit every week. This meeting has changed my life in so many ways and all for the better. I thank God I get to rub shoulders with and pray with men who love Jesus. It is ointment and balm for the wounds of life to draw together and worship the Lord with no ulterior motive other than to worship and adore Him!

Take a stand. Make a decision that you will serve the Lord and no other! Declare you belong to the Holy One of Israel – wholly and outright! Declare that you surrender all to Jesus and ask Him to help you become a man with a heart of flesh. Ask Jesus to teach you how to love your families and then do it! Forgive all those who have ever hurt you. Release them to God and let Him resolve their issues. Our job to stay holy before God, not to accuse our brothers or sisters, mothers or fathers. God knows what happened and you were never alone. You are not alone now.

Oh heavenly Father, please help us to seek you! Help us to forsake this world and all its trappings and lies. Please help us to get down to the root of ourselves and confess our wrongdoings and ask for your forgiveness. Help us to be completely transparent with you. Help us forsake revenge and retribution. Help us forge our resolve to be holy, to walk holy and to live righteous lives that honor you. Please give us hearts of flesh and teach us to love as you love us so we can love our families. Give us wisdom and guide us in this walk of faith Father. Oh Holy One, we need you now! Please come and take up residence in our hearts! Transform us and make all things new in us! In the mighty name of Jesus we pray. Amen.

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